Raw is War
Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania
July 3, 2006
Stolen Championship
By Ed Williams III
July 3, 2006
Ever since ECW One Night Stand, RAW has been without a WWE Champion, but after
one wild night in the city of brotherly love, that is no longer the case. In a
No Disqualificaion, No Count-out, Triple Threat Match for the WWE Championship,
John Cena looked to have everything wrapped up. Cena had laid out Van Dam with
his patented FU, but right before he could make the cover, Edge came in from out
of nowhere and leveled the Dr. of Thuganomics with the same Championship belt
that they were both vying for. With that, the calculating Edge made the cover on
the already fallen RVD and score the easy 1-2-3. Edge had stolen the WWE
Championship from John Cena.
You can argue that Cena should have won. You can argue that Edge’s actions were
somewhat underhanded. But one thing that you cannot argue is that the Rated R
Superstar is the new WWE Champion, and the WWE Championship is back on RAW.
Any time the WWE Championship changes hands, it’s a huge deal, and any time it
changes hands on RAW, it’s an extremely rare occurrence. But before RAW went on
the air tonight, the Championship wasn’t even scheduled to be defended. The
Triple Threat Match was supposed to take place at Saturday Night’s Main Event,
and a Pick Your Partner Triple Threat Tag Team Match was supposed to take place
on RAW at the Wachovia Center. But RVD changed all of that when he decided to
prove that he was a fighting champion and defend the gold right then and there
in Philadelphia. He did prove that he was a fighting champion, but he certainly
didn’t prove that he was a smart one.
The result was the exact thing that ECW’s Paul Heyman was afraid of. Heyman
tried to discourage RVD from going through with the match since it was in a WWE
ring, with WWE referees and against both Edge and Cena. But RVD said that he
believed in himself and he believed in ECW. Heyman wasn’t the only one who
seemed to have some psychic powers on the night. Right before the Championship
Match took place, Edge told Todd Grisham backstage, “Despite being completely
unprepared for this match, I’ll walk out with something that this city hasn’t
seen in 23 years – a champion.” And that’s exactly what he did.
What does this mean for Saturday Night’s Main Event? And how will Cena react to
having the WWE Championship so close to his grasp that he could taste it, only
to have it ripped away by his arch nemesis?
But not all of the fireworks took place in the ring on RAW. Last week, Mr.
McMahon placed a ban on D-Generation X, refusing to let them into the Wachovia
Center. Upon DX’s arrival, Jonathan Coachman and a barricade of security
personnel informed them that they were barred from entering the arena and had to
leave the premises. With that, DX did what they normally do—they improvised. A
DX-sponsored BBQ was thrown outside the area, and with HBK and The Game behind
the party, it’s not surprising that it attracted more than a few bubbly females,
as well as some beer-thirsty dudes looking to snack on a smorgasbord of holiday
food, including a DX-specialty—Mr. McMahon-size cocktail wieners.
As the party outside raged, Triple H took a break from his grilling duties just
as Candice Michelle approached wanting to lure The Game into some post-dinner
activities. Unfortunately for her, his services were already being rendered by a
groupie hiding under the table. The good thing for Candice—not to mention for us
viewers—groupies don’t travel alone, and the second DX groupie hiding under the
table was in a very giving mood, and Candice certainly seemed to have no problem
receiving.
Meanwhile, believing he could finally let his guard down and concentrate on
running his company, Mr. McMahon had no idea the type of night he’d be in for.
His plan to ban DX backfired horribly, and it began when DX seized control of
the WWE production truck. Realizing they had access to every aspect of
production, DX took control of RAW and ruined another Monday night for the
Chairman.
Without access to his private bathroom, Mr. McMahon was forced to use the public
facilities. During the epitome of private moments, Mr. McMahon talked to himself
about his Andre the Giant sized ‘frankfurter,’ never stopping to think DX had
activated the camera installed inside the Wachovia Center’s restrooms.
Realizing his boss was again the butt of a DX joke, Jonathan Coachman burst into
the bathroom to warn Mr. McMahon of their latest stunt. But he startled The
Chairman before he was finished doing his business, and Coachman’s suit got
spritzed by the remainder of his boss’ ‘relief.’ Embarrassed, with wet pants,
and with unwashed hands, Mr. McMahon fled to the ring to address DX’s latest
scheme. His announcement turned into another debauchery, as DX toyed with the
microphone, altering The Chairman’s voice to sound as child-like as Michael
Jackson’s to as deep as Darth Vader’s. He had just enough time to reveal that on
July 15, at Saturday Night’s Main Event, DX would again take on all five members
of the Spirit Squad, but this time it would be in an Elimination Match, stacking
the odds even more in favor of the Squad. With that said, a response was made
DX-style with a doodle of a rooster on the screen adjacent to The Chairman’s
head, reminding viewers of Mr. McMahon’s infatuation with cocks.
Defeated yet again by DX, Mr. McMahon tried to pack it in early and flee the
arena, but he was one step behind. An onslaught of fireworks smoked him out of
the limo just as it began to pull away As he rolled out of the car, his face as
black as a coalminer’s, The Game and HBK stood over him, sparklers in hand,
letting him know that banning DX from an arena is something that should never be
done again.
The Spirit Squad will have DX at Saturday Night's Main Event, but they also had
their hands full on RAW. But in the end, their supreme teamwork led to a 10-man
tag team victory over Eugene, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Val Venis, Viscera and Snitsky.
Plus, while the WWE Championship ended up changing hands, the Intercontinental
Championship did not. Johnny Nitro put his gold on the line against Carlito in
his first Championship defense since winning the title at Vengeance. It was at
Vengeance that some say Nitro stole the gold from Carlito. After hitting the
back cracker on Benjamin at Vengeance, Nitro swooped in and made the pin. And
just last week, Nitro and Carlito were at odds again as they were involved in a
confrontation between Melina and Trish Stratus. It looked as though Carlito was
going to exact revenge on Nitro to once again become Intercontinental Champion,
but it just wasn’t in the cards for the Caribbean native. Carlito was able to
once again hit his back cracker, but when he went for the pin, Melina jumped in
the ring and broke things up causing a disqualification. The Intercontinental
Championship once again slipped through Carlito’s fingers. After the match,
though Trish Stratus made a mad dash to the ring, and immediately started a
vicious cat fight with Melina. While both Divas looked to be suffering some
stiff punishment, DX, who was outside in the production truck, was having a good
ol’ time, showing replays of the cat fight, which showcased the Divas in
revealing positions.
Shawn Michaels and Triple H also decided to have some fun with Armando Alejandro
Estrada. Before Estrada could finish introducing his man, Umaga, HBK interrupted
with an impromptu advertisement for the new DX T-shirt. An enraged Estrada
stormed out of the ring leaving Umaga to dismantle Scott Wright. After the
match, Estrada tried to address the crowd once again, but DX struck again, this
time piping in belching noises every time Estrada tried to talk.
One person who wasn’t interrupted on the microphone was the Legend Killer, Randy
Orton. After seeing a video package highlighting Hulk Hogan joining the nWo at
Bash at the Beach in 1996, Orton came out and noted that it was an inspirational
piece of video. But it was nothing compared to last week, when he saw Brooke
Hogan’s (Hulk Hogan’s daughter) new music video. Orton noted that on an upcoming
episode of Hogan’s hit show on VH1, Hogan Knows Best, the Hulkster will be
picking a date for his daughter, Brooke. Orton decided to send a message to
Brooke on the topic.
“If things go our way, you might see why I’m a legend,” said Orton. “And if your
daddy has a problem with that, he’ll find out why I’m the Legend Killer.”
Orton has gotten the best of several huge legends in sports-entertainment
history including the likes of Mick Foley, Ric Flair, Jake “The Snake” Roberts,
Sgt. Slaughter and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, but none are as big as Hulk Hogan. Does
Orton realize what repercussions his words might have?
After weeks of taking a look at the Highlanders’ journey from Scotland to the
United States, the new tag team made their debut on RAW. The duo looked very
impressive taking out Rob Conway & Matt Striker. Although that’s the team they
were billed against, it was more like a Handicap Match. After getting a glimpse
of the Highlanders in action, Striker refused to tag in saying that the
Highlanders were crazy and he was too smart to get in the ring with them.
Not only was it a great night for Edge, but Lita also picked up a big win on
RAW. One week after helping to ruin Torrie Wilson’s WWE Magazine Cover
Unveiling, Lita went one on one with the sexy Diva and came up big with a
crushing DDT.
Matches
Lita def. Torrie Wilson
The Spirit Squad def. Eugene, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Val Venis, Viscera & Snitsky
The Highlanders def. Rob Conway & Matt Striker
Carlito def. Intercontinental Champion Johnny Nitro (DQ)
Umaga def. Scott Wright
Edge def. WWE Champion Rob Van Dam and John Cena (Triple Threat Match - new Champion)