March 2, 2009
results thanks to pwtorch.com
The show started with a video recap
of the Randy Orton vs. Triple H feud that led to them setting up a WWE Title
match at WrestleMania on last week's show. Hunter: I'm going to break your neck.
Fade to Smackdown last Friday when Hunter was stalked by Legacy.
St. Louis, Mo.: They opened with a shot outside of Orton's sprawling mansion. We're getting a live word from Orton later tonight. And tonight, Hunter in a handicap match against Cody Rhodes & Ted DiBiase.
In-ring: Shawn Michaels came out to start the show. Michaels was dressed in regular street clothes and in an upbeat mood. Michaels started talking about his WrestleMania match against The Undertaker. He said it's very important to understand that he respects Taker, but he is not afraid of him. Taker might be 16-0 at Mania, but he is Mr. WrestleMania. Never outperformed and never will be. He said streaks are meant to be broken and absolutely nothing lasts forever. Michaels said at WrestleMania, something has to give...
Bell tolled, lights went down, then the old school Taker video package aired showing all of Taker's victories at WrestleMania. Back live, Michaels was leaning on the top rope watching the video screen. He had no idea Taker was behind him in the ring. Oh wait, he did. Michaels turned around and slowly said, "Hello Undertaker. I've been expecting ya."
Taker took the mic and said once again, Shawn's arrogance has clouded his judgment. He told Michaels that he respects him, but he's fought many men that he's respected and they've all fallen. Taker said Michaels will be no different. Michaels said they have taken very different career and personal paths, so now that he has his attention...Michaels said he shouldn't have to qualify to face anyone at WrestleMania. Michaels said he revolutionized the ladder match, went an hour, and retired Ric Flair. He pointed at Taker and told him he's the Showstopper.
Taker, agitated, said Michaels has had epic victories at WrestleMania, but then again, he's had bitter defeat. Taker said Michaels is concerned about breaking a streak and winning a match, but he needs to consider what he's going to do physically to him. Taker said he doesn't need to outperform Michaels or steal the show, but when he steps foot in the ring before his peers, Michaels will recognize that he is the most dangerous entity in wrestling. Taker said Michaels should have been more careful in what he wished because Hell's Gates have been opened. Taker said on April 5 in Houston, Texas, you will Rest...
Michaels cut him off and said he will rest comfortably the evening of April 5 because he'll have known he beat The Undertaker. He said Taker might have beaten the other 16, but Taker has never beat him...and he never will. Michaels's music hit, the lights went back on, and Michael Cole said "vintage" Shawn Michaels. Buzzkill. Cole said Michaels has never lost to Taker, but Taker has never lost at WrestleMania. Bam, there's your money segment for Mania. Place your bets time: 9:15.
Hall of Fame plug: They announced the Hall of Fame special on USA Network featuring Steve Austin.
In-ring: Lilian Garcia announced an Intercontinental Title match right now. Insert sarcasm --> Great build-up. JBL came out first as the challenger to C.M. Punk. Jerry Lawler said JBL has been bugging interim GM Vickie Guerrero for so long that she probably granted the match to get him to shut up. Cole referenced JBL's WWE Universe blog that he's going to shock the world at WrestleMania. Punk came out to defend the belt.
1 -- IC champion C.M. PUNK vs. JBL -- Intercontinental Title match
Punk was in control going into the break after nailing a suicide dive on the floor.
They returned with JBL in control. Awkward pin attempt at 7:00 when JBL made a cover and Punk kinda rolled up a shoulder to escape a pin. Punk came back with a swinging DDT off the top rope, then kick strikes and a leg whip. Punk nailed a top rope clothesline and a high knee/running bulldog combo for a two count at 9:00. Punk tried the Go 2 Sleep, but JBL raked the eyes and nailed the Clothesline from Hell for the pin and the win. JBL accepted the IC Title belt with glee and celebrated his victory. Punk, meanwhile, checked his eyes for vision.
WINNER: JBL at 9:35 to capture the IC Title. You could see that finish coming, but it would have been nice for actual build-up to a title match. Interesting to see where this will be going with JBL looking to do something shocking at WrestleMania concerning the IC Title. (*1/2)
Orton home: They showed Randy Orton sitting on the couch apparently with his wife.
Backstage: JBL addressed Vickie Guerrero backstage about him needing to do something for her after she did something for him. JBL said it's a deal, darling. Not sure what's happening. Edge interrupted and Vickie said they haven't talked all weekend. He needs to know what John Cena whispered in Vickie's ear on Smackdown. Vickie screamed that it doesn't matter. Edge said you're right because he's signing his Mania contract tonight.
Orton home: Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler brought in Randy Orton and wife from their home in St. Louis. Orton was asked about violating his no-touch stipulation against Triple H. Orton asked Cole to cue up the video from Smackdown showing Triple H attacking Orton after being physically provoked. They showed Orton beating down Hunter on Smackdown and leaving him KO'ed. Back to Orton, who said Cole calls it a violation, but he calls it restraint. He said he could have punted Hunter in the head and ended it right there, but he didn't. Orton said he wants to take his rightful place as WWE champion at WrestleMania 25.
Up coming: Divas champion Maryse vs. Women's champion Melina.
2 -- Divas champion Maryse vs. Women's champion Melina -- non-title match
Lumberjills were surrounding the ring for this one. Maryse dominated Melina early and often. She put Melina in the bow and arrow, then cut off a comeback and kicked Melina in the head. She then rolled her up for the pin and the win. Afterward, Smackdown and Raw divas squared off against each other. A brawl broke out and the Raw divas stood tall with Melina.
WINNER: Maryse at 2:15. Fine. Just getting divas on the TV for a few moments, but not enough time given to develop a compelling match between Melina and Maryse. "Super fast food" match. (3/4*)
Video package: They recapped John Cena whispering in Vickie Guerrero's ear on Smackdown after interrupting the World Hvt. Title contract signing between Edge and Big Show. They try it again next.
WrestleMania VI video package: They went to WrestleMania VI for Hogan vs. Warrior. Robert Goulet. Goulet! 67,678 was the reported attendance for Andre the Giant finally slapping Heenan and Warrior pinning Hogan.
[Q5 -- Second hour]
In-ring: Vickie Guerrero excused herself for the contract signing. First, though, Vickie had an announcement to make. At WrestleMania 25, they will have a 25-diva battle royale featuring divas from Raw, Smackdown, ECW, and past WWE history. Winner will be crowned the first-ever Miss WrestleMania. Fans booed. Her, not the match.
Back to business. Big Show came out first, then Edge came out for the contract signing. Edge said he was at WrestleMania VI for Hogan vs. Warrior in Toronto and he wants to put on an epic match themselves. He said he knows Show is better than Warrior and he is definitely way better than Hulk Hogan. Edge surveyed the crowd, which booed that line. Edge said they need to put their differences aside and put on an epic match. Edge signed the contract, then Big Show agreed and signed the contract.
Suddenly, John Cena's music interrupted and Edge walked around the contract table to stand next to Show and hide behind his wife. Show wiped his mouth and put his hands in his pockets as Vickie looked down to the mat. Edge asked Cena what he's doing here because he doesn't belong here. Edge said it's official that he isn't in this match. At all. Cena asked Vickie why she didn't tell him. Vickie, you want me to tell them? Edge was confused. He told Show they should get this leech out of the ring.
Vickie interrupted and said she invited Cena out here. She said it would only be fair to the audience to let Cena compete for the title at WrestleMania. Cena then picked up the clipboard and signed the World Title contract. Show asked Vickie why she cares what the audience thinks because he's the #1 contender. Cena told Show to calm down. He said it's time everyone find out the truth. Vickie pleaded with him not to say. Cena said he interrupted the contract signing on Smackdown because...well...he had a piece of information she needed to hear.
Cena said at Smackdown, he told Vickie...pause...that he loves her. Cena had a blank stare right at Edge while the crowd roared. Vickie was dumbfounded. Cena waited it out, then said this might get a little weird because Edge and Vickie might be legally married, but he can't control who he falls in love with. Here's the thing, he knows Vickie has feelings for her. Cena said the heart wants what the heart wants: the World Title and Vickie Guerrero.
Cena told Vickie he loves her and Edge was dumbfounded. Cena left the ring to his music, but Edge interrupted and cut him off. Edge said Cena is playing off her emotional state to worm his way into a WrestleMania match. He told Vickie to rip up the contract right now. Cena whispered from the stage that it's not going to happen. He said he can't take it anymore. Cena said they worked Raw in Boston last week and he knows everyone there. T-shirt vendor. Ticket-taker. Security cam guy.
Cue up a video from last Monday where the security cam picked up Vickie sitting in her office, then Big Show walked in for a quick make-out session while Edge was in the shower. Back live, Cena had a goofy grin with his arms extended as if he can't do anything about what happened. In the ring, Edge was about to explode. Big Show looked down to the ground not sure what to do. Cena told Vickie she has some 'splaining to do. Edge grabbed Vickie by the face to ask her to look him the eye, but she couldn't. Edge sat down in a chair, Cena smiled, Vickie held tears, and Show stood on the outside in horror. Place your Bets time: 15:40.
Caldwell's Analysis: You knew this was coming, but I just don't like the storyline at all. Cena making light of "adultery" isn't exactly a noble babyface trait. Vickie Guerrero, the widow of Eddie Guerrero and single mother for her kids, being subjected to an adulterous storyline because she's trying to earn a living when there's no pension in wrestling following her husband's death is sad. McMahon would say he wouldn't ask talent to do a storyline he wouldn't do first, but McMahon lacks basic decency as a human being, so the argument fails here.
In-ring: Chris Jericho came to the ring for a MITB qualifying match. Jerry Lawler said on commentary he's so sick of Jericho's actions against the Legends that he can't even look at him. Kofi Kingston then came out to face Jericho.
3 -- CHRIS JERICHO vs. KOFI KINGSTON -- Money in the Bank qualifying match
Announcers referenced Mickey Rourke and "The Wrestler" early on, so there's still a working agreement of some sort for WrestleMania. Kofi jumped around the ring early on, then took control going into break.
Jericho was in control out of the break working on Kofi's back. Kofi then came back with a leaping clothesline and palm thrust to the chest. Kofi with a turnaround splash from the second rope for a two count. Kofi nailed a Russian legsweep, then marched around the ring before attempting the boom-boom leg drop. Jericho countered, though, and wanted the Walls of Jericho, but Kofi blocked. Jericho came right back with an enziguiri kick for a two count. Jericho missed with a Lionsault and Kofi nailed the boom-boom leg drop for a two count. Kofi started gyrating around before attempting the Buzzsaw kick, but Jericho slapped on the Walls of Jericho. Kofi teased an escape, then Ric Flair's music suddenly came on. Flair walked out on stage and Jericho released the Walls of Jericho. Jericho then walked back across the ring and Kofi nailed the Jamaican Buzzsaw kick for the pin and the win. Afterward, Kofi walked on stage and celebrated with Ric Flair, who pointed to the WrestleMania banner and told Jericho he's not going.
WINNER: Kofi at 7:55 to qualify for MITB. Nice finish and a nice surprise from Ric Flair. Jericho losing sets him up to destroy a Legend on next week's show and finally get a WrestleMania match of some sort against a Legend of some sort. (**)
Post-match: Cole announced a battle royale on ECW TV tomorrow night with the winner getting the final slot in MITB.
Announcers: Cole and Lawler brought Randy Orton back onto the screen from his home in St. Louis. Orton said he is showing restraint against beating up Hunter by not appearing at Raw tonight. He vowed to pay close attention to the main event of Hunter vs. Legacy.
Backstage: Todd Grisham asked Chris Jericho for his thoughts after losing. Jericho said he's po'ed Flair interfered in his match, but he's going to have his WrestleMania moment on next week's show. Jericho invited Flair back to Raw next week where he ends Flair's moment forever in front of the hypocrites and parasites.
Hall of Fame: Cole recapped Steve Austin, Ricky Steamboat, Funks, and Bill Watts into the Hall of Fame. Cue up the next invite going to Koko B. Ware. Focus on his "unique personality" and very colorful gimmick. Cue up the music video to "Piledriver." Oh, no. They had to go there. Hulk Hogan in a hard hat. Vince McMahon in a red WWF t-shirt. Honky Tonk Man will be inducting him.
In-ring: Rey Mysterio came to the ring for a random tag match. Finlay with Hornswoggle, then Christian returned to Raw. Cole acted as if Christian is a developmental talent who just called up. Why in the world are they delivering a big six-man tag match with zero hype? Rey's reward for carrying the No Way Out PPV main event has been being ignored on Raw and then following Koko in the category of a mid-card kiddy character when Rey should be treated as a main event act.
In-ring: Miz and Morrison were already in the ring, then Kane came out to set up the six-man tag semi-main event.
4 -- CHRISTIAN & FINLAY (w/Hornswoggle) & REY MYSTERIO vs. KANE & World tag team champions THE MIZ & JOHN MORRISON
Christian and Miz started things off here. Finlay took a semi-hot tag and cleaned house, then Rey took a hot tag and smashed Morrison in the corner. He then went up top and nailed a huracanrana for a cover and two count when Miz broke up the pin. Rey wanted the 619 on Morrison, but Kane broke it up. Christian and Finlay then dumped Kane to the floor. Rey set up Mo with the 619 once again and he delivered it this time. Rey then snapped off a signature springboard huracanrana. Not quite the classic ECW Arena huracanrana against Psychosis, but it looked pretty good. Rey with the pin before an excited arena for the win.
WINNERS: Team Rey at 3:30. Really exciting finish after a brief match. ECW wrestlers (are Miz & Morrison on ECW?) put on a good showing with the limited time to hype ECW TV tomorrow night. (*1/2)
Backstage: They showed Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase walking down the hallway in preparation for the main event.
ECW plug: Battle Royale for the final MITB spot on tomorrow's show.
12 Rounds plug: They aired a trailer for John Cena's "12 Rounds," focusing on the super bad guy villain who antagonizes Cena. Movie out March 27.
In-ring: Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes came out to the ring just a few minutes before the top of the hour. They cut back to St. Louis where Randy Orton and wife were shown watching the show. Lilian Garcia said, "and their opponent..." Triple H's music hit, but no sign of Hunter. His music stopped, Lilian re-introduced Hunter, his music played again, but no Hunter.
[Q9 -- over-run]
Cody and Teddy wanted a forfeit from Hunter. Ref Chiota confirmed Ted and Cody as the winners by forfeit. Back to St. Louis where Orton was pretty upset. He said no one should be smiling because Hunter let everyone down. Orton said Hunter isn't the competitor or the man he thought Hunter was. Hunter not showing up tonight means he probably won't show up for WrestleMania. Camera panned back to show Orton's wife. Suddenly, Orton shouted at her not to stand by the door. Triple H was at the door and he bashed in the front door. Some random person went running across the hallway. Pillman vs. Austin angle anyone?
Hunter scared a random woman. Who are these people? Hunter went looking around for Orton, but he grabbed another random person. Shouldn't the cameraman be scared about being shot? Hunter found Orton's wife hiding in the kitchen and demanded to know where he is. Hunter went looking down the hallway again and ran off another random woman after kicking the door in. Hunter passed the A/C keypad on the wall. Maybe Hunter can fix my broken A/C in the office. I've been sweating in here for two hours. Hunter slowly climbed up the stairs to the second floor. Apparently they didn't have a second cameraman in place up there.
He then slowly walked back downstairs and Orton attacked him after popping out of a hole at the base of the stairs. They brawled in the living room before Hunter chucked Orton through the living room window to the front lawn. There was a second cameraman on the outside, apparently. Police then showed up and handcuffed Hunter. Orton screamed that Hunter boke into his home and attacked him. Orton screamed to have Hunter taken away. Orton then attacked a sheriff from behind trying to attack Hunter, but sheriffs held him back into his home. Goldberg...er...Hunter was shown sitting in the cop car sneering as they faded to black.
Caldwell Analysis: So, let me guess, Orton bails Hunter out of jail before their WrestleMania match because he'd rather beat him in the ring for the WWE Title than let Hunter sit in jail and not have to defend the title. The final segment was like a bad horror movie combined with a bad WCW angle combined with Night of the Living Dead combined with that TNA spot where Rhino or Abyss gets thrown into the PPV poster at the base of the grandstands in the Impact Zone. In other words, yuck. Just going way too far into WWE Studiosland with these over-the-top storylines.