Smackdown!

Wichita, Kansas
November 29, 2001

The Nov. 29 episode of SmackDown! emanated from the Kansas Coliseum in Wichita!

Footage was shown from earlier in the day of World Wrestling Federation co-owners Vince McMahon and Ric Flair. Vince was upset because he theorized that Flair was in on it with Stone Cold Steve Austin on Monday night when Austin beat up Mr. McMahon. Vince said he also didn't like that Flair had booked a Leather Strap Match between Stone Cold and William Regal on SmackDown! Ric said he didn't like that Vince wanted the whole world to kiss his ass. He said he didn't like the direction that Vince was taking the company -- and Vince said that Flair then wouldn't like what he was going to do tonight, because a third member would join the "Kiss My Ass" club. Vince then said that Flair should admit that Vince has a nice ass, but Flair instead just said that Vince is an ass!

Stone Cold marched to the ring to a standing ovation as SmackDown! kicked off. Austin said he was at a restaurant earlier in the day, but got his food to go, because he was in a rush to get to the Kansas Coliseum to kick some ass

He said his waitress had told him that she sure was glad he didn't kiss Vince McMahon's ass on RAW -- and Austin said she didn't need to worry, because that's something he just doesn't do. Austin asked Vince how stupid he thought he was to think he would actually kiss his ass. He couldn't believe Vince would think that Austin was as stupid as William Regal, who he also called pathetic.

Stone Cold said that Regal could fly to the moon or invent a cure for a disease, but he would always be known as the British piece of trash that kissed Vince's ass. Austin said that on SmackDown!, he would whip Regal's ass in the Strap Match.

Austin then turned his attention to Vengeance when an undisputed champion will be crowned. Stone Cold said he agreed with The Rock, that it should just be the two of them facing off one-on-one for the title, instead of Austin first facing Kurt Angle and Rock first facing Chris Jericho. Austin said it was like Flair said -- to be the man, you have to beat the man. Austin complained about having to wrestle Angle first, but promised to beat his ass 1-2-3 to advance to the finals. He said he had no favorites, but hoped that Rock would beat Jericho, because an Austin/Rock match at Vengeance would be bigger than their match at WrestleMania was. Austin said that when the dust cleared, he would be the undisputed champion. He then said that was the bottom line, but the Rattlesnake was cut off by Kurt Angle's music before he could finish his catchphrase!

Angle walked out to the stage, as the crowd chanted "Angle sucks!" Kurt said that at Vengeance, Austin wouldn't beat Rock or Y2J, because the Rattlesnake would lose to him. Austin said that if Angle was feeling so brave, then he should get his ass to the ring right now! Angle said that wasn't going to happen. He promised to make Austin tap out at Vengeance. Stone Cold called Angle a red, white and blue jackass -- and the crowd said hell yeah! Angle said that he would whip Austin's ass at Vengeance -- and the crowd said hell no! Austin then told Angle to get his ass out of the Kansas Coliseum -- and the crowd said hell yeah!

Test provided color commentary for the opening match on SmackDown!, a European Championship match pitting the champion, Christian, against Scotty 2 Hotty, accompanied by Albert. Test and Albert both tried to get involved in the match, with Test almost receiving the Worm for his efforts! But as Scotty went for the move, Christian snuck up from behind and nailed the I'm Prettier, then pinned Scotty to retain his championship. After the bout, Christian threw Scotty into a big boot from Test!

Jeff Hardy was getting dressed backstage when Lita walked in, saying she wanted to talk to him about Matt. She thought it was just relationship problems between her and Matt, but she'd seen the way Matt was treating Jeff, and said that Matt had problems.

She said she was also worried about Jeff, since he was competing after suffering a serious concussion at Survivor Series. As Jeff and Lita talked, Matt walked in and put his arm around the two, saying there was nothing to worry about. He said the Hardy Boyz were the most successful tandem in sports-entertainment history, and ran down a list of their accolades. Matt said he had earned the team a No. 1 contenders match for later in the night on SmackDown! Jeff asked who the match was against, and Matt said it was against Big Show and Kane! Matt seemed confident as he left the locker room, but Jeff and Lita seemed worried at the prospect of facing such a massive duo!

Rob Van Dam entered Mr. McMahon's locker room, and called Vince "dude." Vince said he wasn't a dude, he was Mr. McMahon. Vince said that he'd invited RVD to join him a few times, and RVD never had. Vince said he didn't hold grudges, and wished Rob best of luck on SmackDown! against Bubba Ray Dudley. He also wished RVD good luck at Vengeance, when he said Van Dam would face the Undertaker! Much to Mr. McMahon's shock, Van Dam said that was cool, and that he'd just have to beat him again!

William Regal and Kurt Angle walked together backstage, and Regal said he couldn't wait to get his hands on Austin in the Strap Match. Angle said that he would also defeat Austin at Vengeance, and become the undisputed champion. The two then ran into Edge, and Angle promised to make an example out of Edge on SmackDown!

Angle asked if Edge knew who he was talking to, and Edge said yes -- that Regal was a charter member of the "Kiss My Ass" club, and that Angle was a shoe-in! Angle then attacked Edge, and Regal whipped him with the leather strap until Federation officials pulled him off!

After a successful defense against D-Von Dudley on RAW, Rob Van Dam put his Hardcore Championship on the line against D-Von's brother Bubba Ray on SmackDown! Bubba was accompanied to ringside by Stacy Keibler. RVD retained his title, pinning Bubba after a Van Daminator. After the bout, the Undertaker rode down to ringside on his motorcycle, and then Taker assaulted RVD, and gave him the Last Ride onto a trash can! Taker then grabbed the microphone and told Van Dam that he had a lot to learn if he wanted to survive in the Federation -- including how to respect authority. He told RVD to consider this his first lesson, and not to piss him off. Taker said that at Vengeance, he would finish the class, and everyone would respect him.

Coach interviewed Ric Flair to get his thoughts on what Taker just did to RVD. Flair said he was big on respect. He said he was throwing out an offer for someone in the Federation locker room to step up and earn some respect by facing Taker on SmackDown!

Next up, Kurt Angle took on Edge in a non-title match. Before long, William Regal strutted to ringside. Edge looked to have the match won after a spear, but Regal put Angle's leg on the ropes.

Edge soon threw Angle out of the ring, right onto Regal! Edge came to the outside to throw Angle back into the ring, and as Edge went to get back into the ring, Regal nailed him with brass knuckles! Angle then hit the Angle Slam on Edge to pick up the pinfall!

Trish Stratus was set to defend the Women's Championship against Jacqueline, but before Jackie could even head to the ring, out came Mr. McMahon, much to Trish's surprise. The Federation co-owner said he wanted to take the opportunity to let people know that on SmackDown!, a third individual would be inducted into the "Kiss My Ass" club. Vince took off his jacket, and again extolled the virtues of how nice his ass looked. Vince said that Trish probably agreed with him, since the two went back a ways. Vince said he distinctly remembered Trish once telling him that he had a nice ass. Trish said that yes, she did say that. Vince said he had told Trish that she had a voluptuous derriere herself. Vince said he was thinking about all the good times they had together. Vince stared Trish down, and even kissed her neck, again talking about the good times they had together.

He then took her back to WrestleMania, when Trish slapped him across the face. Vince said that because of that, Trish would be joining the "Kiss My Ass" club tonight! He said she wouldn't be doing anything that she hadn't done in the past, although this time the circumstances were different, and this time it was in public.

He said he knew how much she liked being Women's Champion, and told her to get down on her knees. Trish did indeed get down on her knees, and Vince took down his pants. He then said that this time he forgot he was supposed to turn around, and as he exposed his butt to Trish, The Rock's music hit!

Rocky grabbed a microphone as Vince went to pull up his pants, but Rock told him to leave his pants down. Rock said that he knew Vince wanted everyone in the arena to kiss his ass, and Mr. McMahon admitted that was an accurate statement. He challenged Vince to tell The Rock to kiss his ass. Rock then addressed why he asked Vince to keep his pants down, and told Vince to walk to the middle of the ring to find out why. The co-owner waddled out to the middle of the ring, and Rock said he knew how much Vince loved humiliating people, but if anyone in the world deserved to be humiliated, it was Vince himself! He said that with Vince's pants down, it was much easier for Rock to take an object, turn it sideways, and stick is straight up Vince's candy ass!

Rock questioned what kind of object it should be, thinking maybe he would stick a sign from the crowd up Vince's ass. Rock then read some of the fans' signs. He said he had noticed a lot of corn fields in Kansas, and asked for an ear of corn to stick up Vince's ass! Vince covered up his ass, and Rock said he wasn't going to violate Vince with an ear of corn!

Rock said the corn was for the cattle, which gave Rock the idea to stick a cattle prod up Vince's ass!

Rock said the jokes were over, and there would be no signs, ears of corn, or cattle prods. Rocky said that now that Vince knew what it was like to be humilated, then on behalf of himself, Jim Ross, Trish Stratus and the millions, he had just one thing to say -- and Rock gave Vince a huge Rock Bottom and the People's Elbow!

But after doing so, Chris Jericho ran down to the ring with a chair! Rock beat on Y2J for a bit, and was set to give Jericho a Rock Bottom, but Vince hit Rock with a low blow. Jericho then nailed Rock with a chair, set the steel chair on Rock's face and gave Rock the People's Elbow! Jericho grabbed a microphone and told Rock that even though Rock was seeing stars spinning around his head right now, the biggest star of them all was Y2J!

The No. 1 contenders match for the Tag Team Championship was up next, as the Hardy Boyz -- accompanied by Lita -- took on Big Show and Kane. Lita went for the Litacanrana, but Kane simply caught her in mid-air and put her back on the top rope. Jeff accidentally knocked Lita from the top rope, and Matt and Jeff then went for the Poetry in Motion, but Kane knocked out Matt and pinned him, meaning that Big Show and Kane will meet the Dudley Boyz for the Tag Team Championship at Vengeance!

Moments later, Matt approached Jeff and Lita backstage and said it was all Jeff's fault that they lost.

Jeff said that if Matt wanted a match at Vengeance so bad, then he had one -- against him! Jeff then stormed away, and Matt called his brother a sore loser.

Tazz approached Ric Flair backstage and said he wanted to volunteer to take on the Undertaker. Ric sealed the deal with a "Woo!" to which Tazz responded with a "Woo!" of his own. The two men went back and forth for a bit until Flair let loose with a huge "Woo!" to which Tazz responded, "OK, you win!"

That match was up next, as Tazz and Taker went at it. Tazz soon locked Taker in the Tazzmission, but the two men spilled to the outside. Undertaker battled out of it and brutalized Tazz outside the ring. Taker finished Tazz off with a chokeslam to earn a pinfall win. After the bout, he nailed Tazz with the ring steps.

The main event on SmackDown! was the Leather Strap Match between Stone Cold Steve Austin and William Regal, where the winner would be the first man to touch all four top turnbuckles in succession. The fight soon spilled into the crowd, with the two men taking turns brutalizing each other with the leather strap. Back in the ring, Regal choked Austin with the strap, before Austin roared back, hog-tying Regal with the strap, which allowed him to touch three corners, but not the fourth.

Regal battled back, choking Austin, and touching three corners before Austin hit him with a spinebuster.

Austin then hit three of the corners, and gave Regal a Stunner before touching the fourth corner and winning the match!

Kurt Angle then ran down to the ring, and he and Regal double-teamed Austin until Edge ran down and attacked Regal. Austin tossed Kurt from the ring, and he and Edge stood tall as SmackDown! went off the air.