WWE Raw is War

St. Louis, Missouri
January 8, 2007

Umaga spikes back
By Noah Starr
January 8, 2007

Just 24 hours after ending Umaga’s nine-month undefeated streak, John Cena was left lying by the Samoan Bulldozer in St. Louis.

The show started out with a statement from Cena, the first man to ever defeat The Samoan Bulldozer. The WWE Champion addressed the statements made by Umaga’s manager Armando Estrada that Cena’s win at New Year’s Revolution was just a fluke.

Cena was sore and banged up, but still prepared to take on Umaga again for the WWE Championship. Mr. McMahon’s Executive Assistant Jonathan Coachman had other plans in mind for The Champ, however. Coachman explained that one of the best things about the new year is that contracts expire. Coachman was able to sign a Superstar to Raw with an impressive record on both SmackDown and ECW. Raw’s “newest acquisition” was none other than The Great Khali.

Weighing in at 420 pounds, Khali is nearly twice the size of The Champ, but that didn’t deter Cena from facing the Punjab warrior in a non-title match. With Armando Estrada at ringside, The Champ, who seemed to be operating at less than 100 percent, took a huge beating from the behemoth that is Khali. When Estrada introduced a steel chair into the action, Cena was disqualified after using it on his enormous opponent. Still furious from his only loss, Umaga then seized the opportunity, entering the ring and delivering a Samoan Spike to a dazed Cena. As Raw went off the air, The Champ seemed to be in dire straits.

After an incredibly brutal match with DX at New Year’s Revolution that left Triple H with a ruptured quadriceps tendon, Edge and Randy Orton held their own victory celebration. Although the duo seemed to be in rough shape, they appeared proud of their so-called victory. Edge summed up their battle at New Year’s Revolution by saying that “last night wasn’t a wrestling match, last night was a war,” to which Orton added that “Rated-RKO has done what no one else has been able to do: end DX!”

Edge vowed to destroy the other half of DX in a Handicap Match next week on Raw. Just then, a bruised and saddened Shawn Michaels entered the arena to chants of “HBK” from the crowd. HBK promised to be by his best friend Triple H’s side during his surgery, but promised that when he returned, he would deal with Rated-RKO.

Mr. McMahon used his formidable influence to pit celebrity rivals Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell against each other. Rosie and Trump have been at each other’s throats in the media lately and when they finally met in the ring, the fudge flew. Trump finished Rosie off with a flying hair butt as Vince McMahon looked on in approval.

In other Raw action, Jeff Hardy thwarted Kenny Dykstra’s attempt to become the youngest Intercontinental Champion in history. Hardy seemed sore from his Steel Cage Match with Johnny Nitro only 24 hours before, but the champion persevered. Dykstra appeared to get his comeuppance when Ric Flair entered the match; with the referee distracted by Hardy’s tussle with Johnny Nitro, Flair delivered a low blow to Dykstra, which helped Hardy pick up the three count on Kenny. The rivalry between Flair and Dykstra will no doubt continue well into 2007.

Victoria and Melina got some revenge for Victoria’s New Year’s Revolution loss by defeating WWE Women’s Champion Mickie James and Maria. At the pay-per-view, Mickie retained her WWE Women’s Championship against Victoria. Melina and Victoria tried to cut a deal ensuring a win for Victoria and a title opportunity for Melina, but it backfired when the Divas on Victoria’s list came to Mickie’s aid and helped her secure her New Year’s Revolution win. This time however, Victoria & Melina came out on top.

Carlito defeated Chris Masters in a New Year’s Revolution rematch with a little help from the beautiful Torrie Wilson. While the referee was distracted, Torrie slammed Masters with the ring bell giving her man the upper hand.

Also, Cryme Tyme defeated Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch, proving that JTG’s grill is not their only way of putting their money where their mouths are. With their win at New Year’s Revolution in the Five-Team Tag Team Turmoil Match, Cryme Tyme earned themselves an opportunity at the World Tag Team Championship and their winning combination of athleticism and technical teamwork shows no sign of slowing.
 

 Matches

Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy def. Kenny Dykstra

Victoria and Melina def. WWE Women's Champion Mickie James and Maria

Donald Trump def. Rosie O'Donnell

Carlito def. Chris Masters

Cryme Tyme def. Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch

The Great Khali def. WWE Champion John Cena (DQ; Non-Title Match)